HOW A STOIC BECOMES DISCIPLINED THROUGH THE CRUCIAL LOGIC: FOR A 13-YEAR-OLD

 

## **HOW A STOIC BECOMES DISCIPLINED THROUGH THE CRUCIAL LOGIC: FOR A 13-YEAR-OLD**

Think of becoming disciplined like training your brain to automatically ask one crucial question about everything that happens to you.

## **THE MAGIC QUESTION (THE CRUCIAL LOGIC):**

### **"Can I control this, and does that mean it can actually be good or bad for me?"**

**Here's the rule:** Only things you can control can actually be good or bad for you. Everything else is like the weather - it just happens, but it can't really help or hurt you.

## **TRAINING YOUR BRAIN:**

### **Every Day Your Brain Gets "Notifications" (Impressions):**

- "Sarah didn't invite me to her party" 

- "I got a C on my math test"

- "My parents are making me do extra chores"

- "The cool kids think I'm weird"

**Each notification tries to tell you if something is good or bad. But most of the time, your brain is WRONG about what's actually good or bad.**

### **Step 1: Catch the Fake Notifications**

**When your brain says something external is good/bad, that's like a spam email - don't click on it!**

**Examples of "brain spam":**

- "Getting invited to parties = good" (You can't control invitations)

- "Bad grades = I'm worthless" (You can't control the final grade)

- "People thinking I'm weird = terrible" (You can't control others' opinions)

## **THE CRUCIAL LOGIC IN ACTION:**

### **Real Scenario: Your Friend Group Excludes You**

**Brain notification:** "This is horrible! I'm not popular! This ruins everything!"

**Apply the crucial logic:**

1. **Can I control whether they include me?** No - that's their choice

2. **So can their decision actually be good or bad for me?** No - only controlled things can be

3. **What CAN I control here?** How I respond, whether I stay kind, who I choose to be friends with

4. **So what's actually good or bad?** Whether I respond well or poorly - that's in my control

**Result:** Instead of being devastated, you focus on being a good friend to people who want to be friends with you.

### **Real Scenario: Bombing a Presentation**

**Brain notification:** "Everyone thinks I'm stupid! This is embarrassing! I'm terrible at this!"

**Apply the crucial logic:**

1. **Can I control what already happened or what people think?** No

2. **So can the embarrassment actually be good or bad for me?** No

3. **What CAN I control?** How I learn from this, how I prepare next time, whether I try again

4. **So what's actually good or bad?** Whether I choose to learn and improve or give up

**Result:** You bounce back faster and actually get better because you focus on what you can improve.

## **BUILDING THE DISCIPLINE HABIT:**

### **Week 1-2: Catching Yourself**

**Goal:** Notice when you're upset about things you can't control

**Practice:** When you're stressed, ask: "Am I worrying about something I can't control?"

- Can't control the test result → Focus on studying well

- Can't control if someone likes you → Focus on being likeable

- Can't control your parents' rules → Focus on how you respond to them

### **Month 1-2: Getting Faster**

**Goal:** Catch the false "good/bad" thoughts before they make you upset

**Practice:** As soon as your brain says something external is "terrible" or "amazing," pause and apply the crucial logic.

### **Month 3-6: Automatic Responses**

**Goal:** Your brain naturally focuses on what you control

**Practice:** You automatically think "What can I do about this?" instead of "Why is this happening to me?"

## **WHY THIS MAKES YOU SUPER DISCIPLINED:**

### **1. You Stop Wasting Mental Energy**

**Before:** Spend hours worrying about things you can't change

**After:** All your mental energy goes toward things you can actually improve

### **2. You Become Emotionally Tough**

**Before:** Bad external stuff ruins your whole day

**After:** You stay calm because you know external stuff can't actually hurt you

### **3. You Get Better Results**

**Before:** Focus on outcomes you can't control → get stressed → perform worse

**After:** Focus on effort you can control → stay calm → perform better

## **DAILY PRACTICE FOR A 13-YEAR-OLD:**

### **Morning:** 

**Set your intention:** "Today I'll focus on controlling my choices, not worrying about what I can't control"

### **Throughout the Day:**

**When anything bothers you:** Apply the crucial logic

1. Can I control this?

2. If no → It can't actually be good or bad for me

3. What CAN I control in this situation?

4. Focus all energy there

### **Evening:**

**Review:** "What did I control well today? What did I waste energy worrying about that I couldn't control?"

## **THE REAL-WORLD EXAMPLES:**

### **Scenario: Parents Give You Extra Chores**

**Old way:** "This is unfair! This sucks! They're ruining my day!"

**Crucial logic way:** "I can't control their decision, but I can control my attitude. Getting mad just makes ME miserable - the chores still have to be done. I'll do them well because that's the kind of person I want to be."

### **Scenario: Crush Doesn't Like You Back**

**Old way:** "I'm not good enough! I'm ugly! This is devastating!"

**Crucial logic way:** "I can't control their feelings, so their rejection can't actually be bad for me. I can control being kind, interesting, and confident. I'll focus on being someone worth liking."

## **THE SUPERPOWER RESULT:**

**After practicing this for a while, you become the kid who:**

- Doesn't get wrecked by drama because you know it can't actually hurt you

- Stays focused on improvement instead of getting stuck in problems

- Bounces back from setbacks super fast

- Gets respected because you're not desperate for external validation

- Actually achieves more because you're not stressed about things you can't control

**The crucial logic turns you into someone who can handle anything because you know the secret: only your own choices can make your life genuinely good or bad. Everything else is just weather.**

**Start today: Pick one thing that's bugging you and ask "Can I control this, and does that mean it can actually be good or bad for me?" Then focus only on what you CAN control. Do this every day and watch yourself become unstoppable.**